Madonna Offers Blowjobs in Exchange for Hillary Clinton Votes

Madonna, the singer, has publicly promised to give anyone a blowjob who votes for Hillary Clinton. So while Trump has the Russians working for him through hacking, social media bots, and fake news stories, the Democrats have a promise of sex from celebrities?

Technically this is illegal, as follows:

18 U.S. Code § 597 – Expenditures to influence voting

Whoever makes or offers to make an expenditure to any person, either to vote or withhold his vote, or to vote for or against any candidate; and

Shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than one year, or both; and if the violation was willful, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than two years, or both.

A blowjob from a celebrity like Madonna has got to be worth at least $10,000 right? So now imagine if the 15,000 men in the audience decided to take her up on the offer. It could actually make a great video. or at least a very memorable one, and get Madonna the attention and free press she’s obviously craving.

The end could be the ultimate bukakke finish. Let’s see, 15,000 cumshots, averaging say 2 tablespoons of semen would be 29.3 gallons of cum on her. This would take a long time, but since the penalty for paying for votes, applies to both the receiver and the one profiting, the 15,000 men could be imprisoned with her for the 2 year penalty defined above. So that’s only 21 per day, which is easily doable.

Back to the topic of Madonna’s promise, we like to think that her announcement is a very positive one, and all men should thank her for it. This is because her “sex positive” attitude about blowjobs is very good for women to hear. She even specifically mentions that she’s “really good” and she swallows! What better message could we men want to be sent to teenage girls around the world? In their most formative and impressionable years, one of their idols is telling them it’s cool to be great at blowjobs.

Thank you Madonna, you are our hero!

by bjadmin